๐๐๐๐ ๐๐จ๐ฎ๐ฅ๐ฌ (With apologies to Nikolai Gogol)
Like Chichikov, they wish to buy dead souls;
No matter that the souls are very old.
For only names are added to their rolls.
Theyโll pay for them in newly minted gold,
Or in the newly printed notes that fold.
Of course the souls must all have been released
By death, that by description fits the mould.
Thus may the joyous numbers be increased โ
Wealth made by buying up the poor deceased!
No matter that most of them would have died
Quite soon of just old age, and not The Beast.
No matter that soul-traders often lied.
The buyers reap the harvest โ all are lauded.
Our Chichikov would no doubt have applauded.
โ D.N. OโBrien
