Emails? Donations? Raise the roof!
It’s scandalous! – She’ll stand aloof;
Weather the storm;
Stay safe and warm,
Admired, respected – bullet-proof.
Amore Plated
31 Sunday May 2015
Posted in Satire
Monthly Archives: May 2015
Bi-Confused
31 Sunday May 2015
Tags
I need some advice re: my gender.
My preference I need to render.
I’m built like a barge
With extremities large –
Bi-gender? Or is it Big-ender?
Facebook’s 56 Genders
31 Sunday May 2015
Posted in Satire
Wow! 56 genders, now let’s see:
What number among these might I be?
I admit to features
Unlike other creatures –
Can’t find a description that fits me.
My name is Kim – some call me Kevin.
To find my type – that would be heaven,
But none of these match,
And you see, that’s the catch –
I think I must be fifty seven.
facebook_custom_gender_options_here_are_all_56_custom_options
Wacky War
30 Saturday May 2015
One couldn’t make this up – I’m sure –
This Middle Eastern wacky war,
As ISIS like a blood stain spreads
And in its wake leaves heaps of heads
In Libya and in the Levant.
As in The West the liberals chant:
“Lone wolves, they are, who’d do us harm.
They’ve no connection to Islam.”
The Russians smile and lift the ban
On missiles for their friend Iran.
Iraqis from the fighting fly,
While Christians and Yazidis die.
The Turks don’t even try to hide
Support for this new genocide.
The U.S. doesn’t seem to care
(It’s way way way way over there)
Iran to Yemen sends its ships.
Obama swivels his snake hips.
His faulty strokes he has to stop;
No more hard hitting from the top –
Sliced balls! – it’s for straight shots he yearns.
The Fertile Crescent bakes and burns
Herd Mentality
29 Friday May 2015
Posted in Satire
With a hairy humped male she was smitten.
By the camel love bug she was bitten.
Of this beast was enamoured,
But husband Mohammed
Said: “Loving a camel’s not fittin’!”
Then he said: “You’re no longer my missus!
Giving camels those big sloppy kisses!
Soon you won’t have a bath;
Next thing you’ll have a calf!
And you’ll talk like they do – with harsh hisses!”
Love is in the Eire…
28 Thursday May 2015
Posted in Satire
Things are perfect at last in old Eire;
Matrimony’s now equal and fair.
All their problems are solved
For the rules are dissolved –
Same-sex couples may legally pair.
Yes in Ireland it is a great day
As the country declares itself gay
Friendly at last
For the yes vote has passed.
(Those against, they grew old – passed away)
For two men horizontally dancing,
Or a woman, a sister romancing –
How it adds to their wealth
And affirms their good health –
A clear sign of a country advancing
When such couples may legally wed.
May recline in the marital bed.
Oh, you say it’s not right?
Sorry, you’ve lost the fight –
It is so – sixty two percent said.
It’s himself…. and himself….
27 Wednesday May 2015
Posted in Satire
In old Ireland the yes vote was carried,
And the naysayers’ points, they were parried.
Now Seamus and Paddy
Can be Pa and Daddy;
’tis queer, to be sure, to be married.
Stay Safe 2
26 Tuesday May 2015
Posted in Satire
Tags
With safety the concern today
These parting words now many say.
The liberal trendies think it’s fine
To farewell, after cheese and wine,
Their colleagues with this fond adieu,
But really, have they thought it through?
Does saying “Stay safe” to a friend
Alter his fate? – delay his end?
Its undertones are negative;
You seem to doubt that he may live
Much longer in this direful place.
He’ll wonder can he really face
Another day of fear and terror –
Could he make a fatal error?
An accident – a broken neck?
He’ll turn into a nervous wreck.
Saying “Stay safe” to someone
May make them go and buy a gun
And shoot at shadows – no, it’s best
To leave “Stay safe” to all the rest.
For what it’s worth here’s my two cents:
(I think they make a lot more sense)
Say “See you later” – positive –
Assumes the farewelled one will live.
“Goodbye” contains no hint of gloom –
No warning of impending doom.
Look-alikes
17 Sunday May 2015
Posted in Satire
Tags
Conservatives, limerick, Major political parties, poem, poetry, Political left and right, Socialists
It seems there’s a pattern emerging –
Antagonists’ values converging.
The ground that they seek
Is the land of the weak;
They know, there the numbers are surging.
They look more and more like they’re twins,
Regardless of buttons and pins.
What are we to do?
Blue is red and red’s blue.
However we vote – stupid wins.
Segregation Nation
15 Friday May 2015
Of misogyny there is no lack
As inferiors file to the back.
Is this crap what we need?
Medieval? – Indeed!
Every freedom, hard won, they attack.
