I once had a girlfriend named Alice,
Who lived in a beautiful palace.
Her father the King
Disapproved of our fling;
We asked why, but the King wouldn’t tell us.
My beautiful princess named Alice,
Invited me up to the palace.
She said we would dine,
And get sloshed on red wine,
Which was served in the King’s silver chalice.
Now Alice’s father quite hates me;
Gets angry when e’er Alice dates me.
He orders his guard:
“Quick! evict this blackguard!
For my daughter and he will not mates be!”
Now Alice and I are eloping;
From her window to ground – ladder roping.
No one knows of our scheme,
And the King’s in a dream,
For his hot cocoa we have been doping.
For a while we were happy as Larry,
And together long nights we would tarry,
But then Alice would sook,
When I asked her to cook,
Doesn’t pay for a princess to marry.
Now Alice my missus skedaddled,
With a commoner wouldn’t be saddled,
But I would be lyin’,
To say I was cryin’,
For Alice’s brain – it was addled.
© Dennis N. O’Brien, 2012