Hit the road Jac!

Tags

Australian poet, Jacinda Ardern New Zealand Prime Minister, limerick, Limerick poem, Limerick poetry, poem, poetry

𝐇𝐢𝐭  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐝  𝐉𝐚𝐜!

She’s fallen — farewell Kiwi sister.

Goodbye, have her faithful fans kissed her.

She’d bit off far more

Than her impressive jaw

Could chew — so adieu communista.

— D.N. O’Brien

In the Army!

Tags

Australian poet, Formal poetry, limerick, Limerick poem, Limerick poetry, poem, poetry

𝐈𝐧  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐀𝐫𝐦𝐲!

You know what I’ve been thinking?

That soldiers’ balls are shrinking.

For in the ranks

They’re firing blanks,

And at each other winking.

— D.N. O’Brien

The Last Day

Tags

poem, poetry, sonnet, Spenserian sonnet

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐃𝐚𝐲

I worked with a man who was young and smart;
He was honest too, as the day is long.
Forty years ago did our paths then part,
And I thought forever, but I was wrong.
When I’d last known him he was straight and strong,
But the man I met on the year’s last day,
To my memories he did not belong:
He was bowed and bent and his hair was grey,
And he said as I shook his hand: “G’day”
In a feeble voice, (Oh his hand was cold),
And he gazed at me in the strangest way,
And he softly said: “Well you have grown old.”

So we reminisced, then said our goodbyes,
And he shuffled off — with his two good eyes.

— D.N. O’Brien

The Greatest Game

Tags

Australian poet, darts, Formal poetry, poem, poetry, sonnet, Spenserian sonnet

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐆𝐚𝐦𝐞

The greatest game is darts — and I must say,
Dart players are the fittest men of all —
Just watch these perfect specimens at play!
No matter whether they are short or tall,
These mighty marksmen with their skills enthral.
Like little arrows shot from bended bows,
Their darts fly at the board upon the wall.
How do they execute such perfect throws?
The dart is held with flights close to the nose,
Then with a smooth movement of arm and wrist,
Toward the triple 20, off it goes,
And seldom is that tiny target missed.
So hail these sportsmen — raise a mighty cheer
To champions of chips, meat pies, and beer.

— D.N. O’Brien

Fly Wins Debate!

Tags

Harris / Pence debate, Limerick poetry, poem, poetry

𝐅𝐥𝐲  𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐬  𝐃𝐞𝐛𝐚𝐭𝐞!

A fly landed on Pence’s head.

Soon throughout the land the word spread!

Though both still debated,

The fly fascinated,

So it mattered not what they said.

— D.N. O’Brien

Thinking Nice Thoughts

Tags

Anti-depressants, Australian poet, poem, poetry, sonnet, Spenserian sonnet

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐍𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬

I’ve started thinking nice thoughts every day,
And magically the world’s a better place.
All existential threats have gone away.
No longer are there any foes to face.
I’ve thrown away my nunchuks and my mace.
My rifles I have flung into my lake
With all my ammunition — every case.
It’s so easy to do, a piece of cake!
Nice thoughts are all you need, make no mistake!
They’ll make your wordly worries disappear!
No longer do my limbs begin to shake
When I see scary things — I have no fear!
(These pills the doctor gave me work so well,
I think I’d be exuberant in Hell!)

— D.N. O’Brien

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐁𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐞

Tags

Australian poet, Flippin Arkansas, Flippin Police Department, limerick, Limerick poem, Limerick poetry, poem, poetry

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐁𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐞

All these jokes about Flippin must cease!
Or I’ll call up the Flippin Police!
It ain’t flippin’ funny
To mock our town sonny!
You’re flippin’ disturbin’ the peace!

— D.N. O’Brien

Flippin Arkansas Police Department

Worms

Tags

Australian poet, Can of worms, Nightmares, poem, poetry, sonnet, Spenserian sonnet

Worms

Once all the worms, in cans were tightly sealed;
For those invertebrates would cause us harm.
But cans are opening, and there revealed,
The slimy creatures. Some sound the alarm,
But most say: “Do not panic, please stay calm.
The worms will not destroy us – they’re benign;
They even have a certain wormy charm;
Keep opening the cans — all will be fine —
Now try this rich ricotta with your wine.”
The worms all congregate and reproduce,
As on the riches of the host they dine,
Until the last imprisoned worm’s let loose!
I scream: “What is that crawling in my head!”
I’d best not drink that home-brew before bed.

– D.N. O’Brien

Viral Conversation

Tags

Australian poet, Civet cat, limerick, Limerick poem, Limerick poetry, poem, poetry, Wuhan Virus

𝐕𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

Two viruses having a chat:
“I come from Wuhan, via a bat.”
Said the other microbe
Whilst adjusting his robe:
“This is genuine fur — civet cat.”

— D.N. O’Brien

The Frightened Ones

Tags

Australian poet, Culture of fear, Fear, Formal poetry, poem, poetry, sonnet, Spenserian sonnet

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐎𝐧𝐞𝐬

It is the era of the frightened ones —
The trembling terrified who freeze in fright.
They’re terrified of viruses and guns,
And anything that goes bump in the night.
Of snakes and spiders and potato blight.
Of mice and elephants and also bears;
And darkness, one must not turn off the light
When they’re asleep — they’ll be killed in nightmares!
They’re scared of ants and certain plants and hares,
And every type of mole; and humming birds.
They’re scared of circles, rectangles and squares,
And poets who write poems with big words.
They’re scared of clocks and smelly socks and elves.
But what they’re really scared of is……. themselves.

— D.N. O’Brien