Vespasian

Tags

Augustus, Australian poet, Australian traditional poetry, Caligula, Claudius, Galba, Nero, Otho, poem, poetry, Roman emperors, Tiberius, Vespasian, Vitellius

Augustus Caesar made the Empire great;
His rule was firm but not imperious.
For his successor Rome would have to wait,
But when he died, his stepson, old Tiberius,

Stepped up and for a while was somewhat fair –
Until Sejanus got the Emperor’s ear.
Soon he was smothered by his awful heir –
Caligula – a man all Rome would fear.

But when with stab-wounds he was duly riddled,
Poor Claudius tried hard to put things right.
As Rome was burning Emperor Nero fiddled;
The legions now were spoiling for a fight.

So Galba’s rise, it put an end to Nero,
As Nero with some help fell on his sword.
Then Galba fell to Otho – Rome’s new hero,
And Otho for a short time Rome adored;

Until Vitellius was crowned as Caesar;
Vitellius turned out to be bad news.
Next to be crowned was the Judea seizer;
Rose to the throne the conqueror of the Jews.

The Empire had endured the worst of men –
Vespasian would make Rome great again.

Grilled (by) Lobsters

Tags

Australian poet, Australian traditional poetry, Clean up your room!, Jordan B Peterson, Lobsters, poem, poetry

I had a nightmare about mobsters.
They had whiskers and claws – they were lobsters.
I was tied to a chair, and their pincers,
They pinched, and they laughed at my winces.
And they said in their strange lobster voices:
“Be a man – you have plenty of choices.
Don’t be weak – this is pretty mild torture.
Just remember what Peterson taught ya:
Life is hard, but be brave as you suffer;
You’ll emerge quite considerably tougher.”

I awoke in my bed safe and sound,
And no lobsters were there to be found.
It was like I’d escaped from the tomb.
I proceeded to clean up my room.

Clean up your room!

Distant Drums

Tags

Australian poet, Civilizational decline in the West, limerick, Limerick poem, Limerick poetry, Neo Marxists, poem, poetry, The radical Left

If you’re a straight guy and you’re white,
Better teach all your boys how to fight.
For the world’s on the slide.
There’ll be no place to hide
When they finally come for the Right.

Catnapped

Tags

Australian poet, limerick, Limerick poem, Limerick poetry, poem, poetry

It seems that a cat’s come to grief.
According to our Police Chief,
A woman’s pet’s missing.
While in the yard pissing,
Her pussy was grabbed by a thief.

Left Liberal Trails

Tags

Australian poet, Beta males, Culture of complaint, Left Liberals, limerick, Limerick poem, Limerick poetry, poem, poetry, Snail trails, The Loony Left

Dumb females and their beta males –
I’m sick of their whimpers and wails.
“The system’s unfair!
And your hate we can’t bear!”
They’re slimy and slippery like snails.

Loudly Crowing

Tags

Australian poet, epigram, Kiwi actors, mediocre actors, New Zealand actors, poem, poetry, Russell Crowe, Russell Crowe Australia Day comments, Virtue signalling actors

“Australia Day is wrong!” says Russell Crowe.

Well he’s a Kiwi actor – he should know.

Let me count the ways

Tags

Australian poet, Australian traditional poetry, Donald Trump, Formal poetry, poem, poetry

I like Trump for the way he blurts things out –
Things that he’s thinking. What he’s thought about
For quite some time and really thinks is true;
I like the way he uses satire too.
I like his clear disdain for beta males.
I like his tweets – his wins, and too his fails.
I like him for his forthrightness and wit.
I like the way he takes from fools no shit.
I like his clear love for the U.S.A.,
And all the things that he’s not scared to say.
But mainly what I like about the guy
Is how he doesn’t quite know how to lie.

[After reading How He Is at Flammeus Gladius]

Australia Day

Tags

Australia Day, Australian poet, Australian traditional poetry, First fleet 1788, Formal poetry, poem, poetry, sonnet, Spenserian sonnet

Australia Day! Come on! Let’s celebrate
Our liberty, our fairness, rule of law.
The qualities that made Australia great:
The sacrifice in theatres of war;
The mateship that is at our nation’s core.
Turn deaf ears to the ones who would divide.
These weak but wily worriers – ignore.
They’ll crawl under the nearest rock and hide,
And from their lair cheer on the darker side;
Just leave them to their wild imaginings.
We love this land that stretches far and wide.
We benefit from all that progress brings.
Had not those ships sailed in in ’88,
Would such success have been this island’s fate?

Sliding South

Tags

Australian poet, Crime in South Africa, poem, poetry, sonnet, South Africa, South Africa in decline, Spenserian sonnet, White farmer murders in South Africa

South Africa is going to the dogs.
The squatter camps are crammed with fearful whites.
A once great nation has worn out its cogs;
Its gears no longer mesh; dim low its lights.
The people cringe in fear on darkest nights,
When bush knife or the bullet from a gun
May cut life short; as in the street the fights
Go on – the gangs attack – the victims run.
A failing state when all is said and done;
It slides back to its troubled tribal past.
As sure as westward sinks the setting sun,
So is the shadow’s shroud advancing fast.
By all accounts there’s little hope I’d say.
If not a shithole, it’s well on the way.

Shitholes protest

A Determined Defence

Tags

Australian poet, Determinism, epigram, Free Will, poem, poetry

You ask me why I chose to kill?
I didn’t choose – there’s no free will!