Brain Drain

Tags

haiku, poem, poetry

What’s wrong with me doc?
It’s Islamophobia.
Is there a cure doc?

Sure, brain surgery
To quickly make you conform –
A lobotomy.

Cane Toad Golf (haiku)

Tags

cane toad, golf, haiku, poem, poetry

Toad Abode

Summer’s nearly here
Black tadpoles in the shallows
Cane toads multiply

—————

Let’s Go Clubbing

Cane toads under foot
Toads in shoes, in pool, on lawn
Break out the golf clubs

—————

Teed Up

Toad on a toad stool
Sportsman selects his driver
Suited to a tee

—————

Calculating on the Hop

One fifty to hole
It’s a medium sized toad
Seven or eight iron?

—————

Amphibian Ace

Keep eye on the toad
Now take a nice relaxed swing
A toad in the hole!

—————

Super Toad!

Oh well struck my friend!
A great drive down the fairway
Who said toads can’t fly?

—————

Toads Get Message

Caution, cane toad plague
Bloody toads are ev’rywhere
Except golf courses

—————

Racism

Green frogs protected
Toads are exterminated
Easy being green

————–

Hobson’s choice

Hit with club or freeze?
Killing methods debated
Cold blooded murder

————–

Skin Deep

Green frogs are pretty
Brown warty toads are ugly
Toadaphobia

————–

Desperate Measures

Green paint gone missing
Rumours of a cover up
Cane toads suspected

————–

False Frogs

Green frogs ev’rywhere
While cane toads have disappeared
Paint stripper needed

————–

Play On!

Toads allege cruelty
Substituted for golf balls
Nothing proven…… Fore!

————–

Suspicious Death

Cane toad murder case
A golfer is arrested
Witness croaks, case dropped

————–

Good News and Bad News

Toads declared useful
Cane toads briefly celebrate
Buy toad skin handbags!

Haiku Markets

Tags

haiku, poem, poetry

Stock market rule one
You buy a parcel of shares
Stock price decreases

Stock market rule two
You sell a parcel of shares
Stock price increases

Stock market rule three
You buy a “safe” company
News! – profit downgrade

Stock market rule four
You buy some insurance shares
News! Storm disaster!

Stock market rule five
You buy supermarket shares
News! Major price war!

Stock market rule six
Your bank makes a good profit
News! Greedy bankers!

Stock market rule eight
One too many syllables
So no rule seven

Stock market rule nine
Your bank makes enormous loss
News! Man bites a dog!

Stock market rule ten
All stock market analysts –
Crystal ball gazers