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Boiling Frogs

Watch for signs of distress in their eyes.
Calm their terror and suppress their cries.
Sooth their fears; they’ll adapt
As their strength is all sapped;
In the end they’ll succumb to your lies.

Most people I suppose are aware of the boiling frog theory – that if you put a frog (or frogs) in a pot of water and then very gradually apply heat and bring the pot of water to the boil, the frogs will not notice until it is too late and they are boiled alive. Now I haven’t tested the theory due to a shortage of frog volunteers, but I strongly suspect that in practice it doesn’t work – once the temperature reaches the uncomfortable stage the frogs will vacate the pot. (if they can) However, I do believe based on observation and experience that the theory does have validity when applied to human beings.

Applying the Boiling Frog theory to humans:

First select a representative cross-section of human beings and place them in a pot of lukewarm water. Now place the pot on the stove and turn on the heat. Now here is the secret to success – raise the heat very very slowly and watch for signs of distress in any of the occupants of the pot. Should distress be apparent then immediately pause raising the heat. (note: do not reduce the temperature; this will undo the conditioning that you have so far accomplished) Offer soothing words to the distressed until you have calmed them and then continue raising the heat as before. It may be necessary to repeat this procedure many times before the fatal temperature is reached – be patient.
In rare cases one or two of the humans may continue to complain despite your soothing words, and may even make it clear that they realise what you are doing and what your final goal is. If this occurs remove these individuals from the pot and dispose of them in a thoughtful and responsible manner.
Provided you follow my instructions carefully I’m quite confident that in time you can raise the temperature of the water to boiling point and achieve your objective.

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