Tags
An over educated twit,
An algorithm he has writ
To analyze poetic Lit
And sort the good stuff from the shit.
No, this is not a silly joke;
I’m not aware that he’s a soak.
He’s just a poor misguided bloke
Who got in with some dodgy folk.
In coding up his little app
This un-poetic confused chap
Post modern brains set out to tap,
But all he got was free verse sap
From pros at universities,
Where each with everyone agrees;
Where rhyme and reason no one sees
And all are paid quite handsome fees.
He reasoned these guys write the best
So used their methods for his test.
No matter how their words were messed
These must be better than the rest.
‘Twas engineering in reverse:
These poets on the public purse
Told him theirs was the proper verse;
All other styles – well they were worse.
He took these shysters at their word;
He’s not a poet – he’s a nerd;
Knows not a sonnet from a turd.
(I’m just repeating what I’ve heard)
He wrote the program based on these
Parameters the system grease;
That keep it turning – stop a seize.
(The works that those in power please)
So rhymes must best be slant or sight;
No satire please – ‘twill grade it “light”
And if the meter’s neat and tight
It gets a fail – imperfect’s right.
So let his program run its course
With Keats or Shelley as its source;
Without a skeric of remorse
They’ll be rejected – and with force.
So too will Shakespeare and Bob Frost;
Into the garbage both are tossed.
All works of Poe and Brooke are lost.
“Just how much did this program cost?”
Now feed the thing some broken prose,
Say, of your inner fears and woes,
Or of the jam between your toes –
“Good Poetry!” the screen now shows.
LINUS FERNANDES said:
*Hooting sound*
blogtendi said:
Reblogged this on BLOGTENDI.
ngc4889 said:
Wow, Just wow. This is the most amazing piece ever, What inspires you man? is it something you ate, well tell me. 😛
P. S. Hoffman said:
Maybe it was the pacing, or the rhyming scheme, but I read this as if a modern day minstrel was singing it, lute and all. And I loved it.
tessthedancer said:
So great!!!
sweetlaureen said:
Do you can follow me ?
sweetlaureen said:
Beautyful picture *.*
Light Worker 29501 said:
ROTFLMAO!
Pingback: The Poetry Sorting Algorithm | Our New World
Sal Marlboro said:
I am not on the band wagon to encourage brilliance since the great writer, Shelley was misspelled, BUT…amusing at least.
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Well spotted – fixed
Sal Marlboro said:
From a writer to a writer: it is quite like a friend whom you are eating across from at lunch and your friend has a bit of spinach in their teeth. If you are not a true friend, you don’t say anything; if you are, you tell them to clean it out! ; )
jeevascrow said:
This was very pleasant. I hadn’t heard of this app before…honestly, I’m a little afraid to look it up, but the whole idea is ridiculous. It’s like when people mathematically rip apart Mozart, there’s no point. He used the tools we created to write music to compose his own, but that doesn’t mean the medium controls the work. The work takes advantage of the medium. Poetry is also one of those things that can’t be determined by formula.
By the way, I really did love the rhyme and meter here. It’s been a long time since I’ve read one that was so well tailored to the poet’s own voice.
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Glad you liked it
Human Relationships said:
Reblogged this on Human Relationships and commented:
Wow! This is a masterpiece! I hope everyone will find time to read those lines! This is making your spirit stronger! Every word is written with a meaning of it, and yet, simple honest words with pride!
Love it!
LauraALord said:
Well done!
wiseplagueis said:
A nice one this was,
Read it without a pause.
Poetry makes feel like Yoda
Which only seems to rhyme with soda.
julieallyn said:
Reblogged this on A Sawyer's Daughter and commented:
This chap sure has a way with words
Prose and thought
Our heart’s desire.
All for naught,
For technology fans the flames.
Controversy that is surre
To feed the fire?
OK. Longfellow, I’m not. Still though I thought this was worth a share…
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Thank you for the comment
captainrobinlea said:
Reblogged this on captainrobinlea.
themanfrmarz said:
Haha. Hats off.
Chatty Owl said:
Ha! A good and bitter attitude! Nice one. Well done on freshly pressed.
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Thanks
Intergalacticbattlegirl said:
Ha!
Pingback: The Poetry Sorting Algorithm | Human Relationships
appslotus said:
Reblogged this on Apps Lotus's Blog.
thebardonthehill said:
I keep reading just horrible flowery prose that’s dressed as poetry because someone put it in lines. Loved yours. I’d like to force-feed it, Longfellow,and all those you mentioned daily to every snob professor and critic who is ruining the word “poetry” with their free verse garbage. Keep up the good fight.
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
I’ll try – thanks
Brian Anthony Hardie said:
Reblogged this on Brian Anthony Hardie and commented:
Good poet
Canakkale Turu said:
Reblogged this on Çanakkale Şehitlik Turu.
sobrien65 said:
well done. I write poetry too but not as good as this. thanks for the post.
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
You’re welcome
Stuart M. Perkins said:
Loved it!
maledaniel said:
Good
tonykugs said:
Reblogged this on Ugandan prodigy.
tinkerthinker22 said:
Reblogged this on tinkerthinker22 and commented:
I need to learn how to do this…
foodaholicgirl1 said:
Lol that was amazing and unique piece. Love all the natural-rhymes and the forced-rhymes 😛 Love the way you have described the story of this poetry algorithm and at the same time pretended to use it. A M A Z I N G !
Jgncs said:
Truly excellent. Congrats.
claudia said:
Best rhymed poem I read in years, thanks 🙂
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Glad you liked it.
thebardonthehill said:
By the number of likes and comments, your poem must have been featured. Congrats! Hope you picked up a lot of followers. I came back to comment again because I was looking through some of my archives and came across this poem which ends with somewhat the same subject as your poem. You’ve probably read it before, but I’ll leave a link in case some are notified of a new comment and come across it that way: http://thebardonthehill.wordpress.com/2012/07/08/the-perfect-foil-by-dennis-lange/
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Yes, it was featured on “Freshly Pressed” which was a bit of a surprise. Followers have increased as well. Read your poem and agree – I guess formalist poets are pretty rare, so a bit of a novelty. Every time I get a like or follow I check their website but it’s only once in a blue moon that I come across another formalist poet. Flammeus Gladius (Tom Riley) who I have on my Blogroll is a very good poet and worth a visit.
thebardonthehill said:
I’ve followed him but I don’t seem to be getting notifications from his website. I don’t know if some follows only put the blog posts in my reading list and not in my email or what.
wendybarronwrites said:
This is a hoot! I feel like I’ve found a kindred snarky spirit where poetry is concerned. I haven’t studied or even read any poetry in at least 20 years. I recently had to write a poem for a class, and found all my knowledge and leanings were completely passé. My poem reflected my bemusement at the change in fashion, and it got the laughs I was hoping for, and more praise than I expected.
PS – found you via Freshly Pressed
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Glad you liked it. I think a lot of people still like poetry that has rhyme and metre, but few will admit it – fashion is a powerful thing.
Povonte said:
Very good poem, You really put some heavy things in it..
Sandra Conner said:
Oh, wow — this is TRUE POETRY! What a terrific job you’ve done: neat and tight, with lovely rhythm. And, no, I had not seen it. I don’t know how I could have missed it. But sometimes I do miss stuff in my Reader. Thanks so much for giving me the link. As far as I’m concerned, you’re one of the great master’s of poetic satire. One reason for that is the fact that people who read your work can understand what you’re really saying.But you didn’t have to sacrifice excellent meter and rhyme to make that happen. The problem with some of the other guys is that some of the times it’s hard to figure out exactly what they mean. And when that’s the case, the whole work is a waste, because if the reader can’t understand it, he can’t get the point. Your work doesn’t carry that kind of baggage. You are truly a very talented man, and I mean it when I say that, as a poet, it’s an honor to call you my friend.
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
Well thank you Sandra, and the feeling is mutual.
Desdi said:
This brilliant gem escaped me. Until now . . .
Wow. You were ahead of the Po-Tech forces even back in 2014. Great write.
Desdi said:
Can I post this one at Hello Poetry if I credit you as the poet and provide a link?
It’s too good to waste.
https://hellopoetry.com/
Dennis N. O'Brien said:
By all means Desdi – go ahead.